One of my old brothers once said that “If life is too sweet, you would take everything for granted. If it is too sour, it would take the fun out of you. You need a balanced.” Recently, I have found myself reflecting on these
words because it’s a true reflection of my journey that we all can relate to.
During second year in college, I went through series of struggles. I enrolled in school with no means to pay for my tuition. I had no family member around to support me. I was broke and food was hard to come by. Determined to finish college, I often gave any money I made to school.
I was living with a roommate who had similar struggles. He and I got jobs as overnight stockers at Target. Our regular day at school entailed a full load of classes and minimum wage part-time jobs on campus. We worked at the cafeteria as dish washers and beverage runners and ended our day as convenient store workers. After the normal day of work, we walked a mile and a half to Target to work the overnight shift. We did this every day in the snowy-cold weather. I recall certain mornings were difficult, either dealing with frostbite from the long walk to work in the cold-snowy weather. Moreover, I had to stay up to complete any unfinished school assignments before classes. I had to admit I slept less and was tired most of the times. This hardship went on for months because I have no choice. I always reminded myself that some people had it worse than me. I had no time to complain about my life.
Being so that I was broke, I was careful about how much I spent on food and was careful about what I can afford. I couldn’t even ask girls out on dates because I couldn’t afford to take them out. I just wanted to survive and breathe. It wasn’t fun. I didn’t have warm winter pants and gloves but I was okay. I was ashamed and embarrassed to say this now but I would make excuse after excuse just to avoid going out with friends.
At the end of the semester, I got kicked off campus because I couldn’t afford to pay for my room. I moved in with a friend and we made the commitment to share the rent together. Little did I know that he had financial struggles on his own. We struggled each month to pay the rent, because my roommate was late on his part of the rent. It always put us in a difficult position with the landlord. The landlord confronted us a few times about these late payments. I recall one particular instance the landlord knocked at our door. I opened the door. He said, “Where is my rent?” I told him that I had half of it and was waiting for my roommate share. He got really upset and vented about it. It was clear he had had enough and wanted us to move out. We got kicked out of the apartment shortly after. I was homeless again. I then moved in with another roommate and I went through an almost similar experience.
Along the way, I made some good friends. I met people from all over the world, from different ethnicities and nationalities. I became aware of their struggles. Everyone had their own battles. It gave me comfort to know that I was not alone. I met a Nigerian who lodged at one of our apartments for a year. He was homeless at that time. He talked about wanting to become a musician. He would walk several miles to meet a group and rehearse each day. He was determined. I found out recently that he had released a song. He made it. I realized that life does not give us a perfect situation. You just have to make the best of each situation and keep moving forward.
Today, as I look back at those days, I realize these struggles had built me. It had made me wiser and stronger. I don’t think anything can easily break me now. I realize that life is not supposed to be a smooth path. It goes zigzag. At times, you’re up and at times you’re down. Struggles are there in our lives to teach us and to remind us how strong we are.
Struggles are there to guide us and move us forward. No pain no gain. Each day, I feel like I am rising. Each struggle I face, I see as a blessing. I try to see the beauty in life rather than just the frustration. Every single experience added something unique to my my life.
I hope you can embrace your struggles and see the beauty of in them. Struggles do not ultimately define our lives. We do.
Thank You!